


Who you are, who you chose to be

by margoteve



Category: Tales of Arcadia (Cartoons), Trollhunters - Daniel Kraus & Guillermo del Toro
Genre: F/M, Gen, I had great title for it but I forgot to write it down dang, I had thoughts about Wizards and I couldn't sleep so here's my 4am fic, Jim's experience and feelings after becoming human again, Post Wizards, there are other people mentioned but I only marked those speaking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:08:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25857937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/margoteve/pseuds/margoteve
Summary: Jim doesn't feel comfortable in his human skin.
Relationships: Jim Lake Jr./Claire Nuñez
Comments: 24
Kudos: 142





	Who you are, who you chose to be

It felt wrong. His returned humanity felt like a pair of old jeans that in theory should fit him just fine but somehow... Didn't.

Don't get him wrong, he loved being able to be in the sun, eat and cook human food, just be Jim Lake Jr and not the Trollhunter. Getting used to a new sleep schedule wasn't that hard either. Everything should have been back to normal! And yet, at the same time, he felt out of place.

His senses were so much duller than as a half-troll. His strength was lower. He still had the agility, his training still aiding him but it wasn't like before. The sense of freedom, the confidence was subdued. 

It was like a jacket that should fit him well and yet, something was missing. Sometimes he'd catch himself checking his lower teeth, his skin colour, looking for that greyish blue. Why? It was beyond him. He should have been satisfied with his humanity but missed his troll half.

It must have been obvious at least to Claire, because one day she asked: "Do you want to be a troll again?"

He looked at her surprised and tried to turn it into a joke. Again? And what? Eat socks and cutlery? Nah, no way! He enjoyed his life. Without the burden of being a trollhunter, his shoulders felt so much lighter.

Claire nodded along and snuggles into his arms. "I love you no matter the form," she reminded him and they dropped the subject for the night.

Sometimes he had nightmares, his past chasing him and he would wake up in cold sweat reaching for the amulet that wasn't there. It left its mark on him. On his face and in his mind but that wasn't the problem. Letting go of the Jim Trollhunter was easy. He missed the thick trollish skin as if it could protect him from his mind, but he knew it wasn't true.

He had to learn to move on.

"You know if you ever want to-" Douxie sometimes would start saying but a quick shake of Jim's head would end that sentence before being fully uttered.

Moving on, he told himself. Just moving on. He put one foot in front of the other. This was his life. Like a shoe that should be his size but somehow pinched him.

This is how it should be.

"What's the occasion?" He came home to find Walt, his mom, Claire, Toby, Blinky, Douxie, and even Nari in the living room.

"Jim, we are worried for you," Barbara said as she approached her son giving him a big hug.

"If it's about the burned pan yesterday I think it's a bit of an overreaction, mom," he joked stepping back. He was confused with all this attention on him. He didn't expect everyone to come together like this.

"Young Atlas," Walter spoke next. "It must have been so hard for you to switch forms so rapidly. I can't imagine how hard the adjustment must be for you..."

Jim looked between all his family and friends. "Alright? Yeah, it was... A bit hard, maybe? What's this all about? Guys?" His eyes turned to Douxie and Nari.

"Your family wanted you to have a bit of a choice." The Wizard replied and set a jar on the table. "I recreated Merlin's transformation potion with Nari's help, adding a few personal tweaks. You can use it... Or not. It's up to you, mate."

Jim was stumped. Stunned really. He accepted the jar and held it like it was a bomb. Later that day he stored it under his bed to hide away from his itching mind.

It stayed there for a couple of days, then weeks. He might as well have forgotten about it. Like a Selkie who willingly gave up her seal skin.

Then one day he was looking for something, a magazine? Or maybe just cleaning. The jar was there. It glowed softly in the dark. He reached for it. The spell burning his hands. He didn't remember his trip to the bathroom. All he knew, when he went through the kitchen's door was that he was back. His skin was comfortable again.

"Mom, I'm home," he said and hugged his mother tight.

"Yes," she said. "Yes, you are."

**Author's Note:**

> Jim is best boy no matter the form but I have a visual preference for his half-troll self. It was visually the best IMO. Also, I felt like going back human cheapened his previous experience. No, I don't accept criticism on that front. But I do accept criticsm on grammar/spelling.
> 
> Leave a kudo/comment if you liked this as well!


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